Social Media is Cancelled

Happy Hump Day!

So, my 11 year old mini me, got an iPhone for Christmas from her uncle. We never asked for this but since he was sweet enough to get it we thought why not let her have her fun. We all decided (blended family: mom, step mom, dad, step dad) that we would only let her operate it on Wifi, therefore we don’t receive a bill, and we can lessen how much she uses it.

Well, needless to say my little munchkin turned into a zombie, not wanting to leave the house, come out of her room or even hold a decent conversation with us. This, among other things, caused us to take the phone from her and I am so happy that we did it. Sure, kids need their freedom, but I don’t want an 11 year old that’s glued to her phone, heck, I’m a 34 year old trying to kick the habit myself. I am so glad that we made this decision because since removing the phone she has held FULL conversations with me, we’ve watched a couple of shows together without either of us reaching for a phone, we even made brownies as a family just last night (see above picture).

This has taught me so much about myself, I think I have too much freedom on my phone as well, and I’ve made it a point to put it down and pick up a book, a conversation, a pen, a laptop (to blog of course), and do something…ANYTHING beneficial and constructive. Each day as a mom I learn something new about myself and my children and I’m so thankful to be the one getting those lessons. I don’t ever want Riley, or BJ to seek validation from a 6 inch screen that is basically only the highlight reel of peoples actual lives. I want them to create their own lives outside of a telescope of what other people think. Will she get the phone back? I really don’t know because I missed her when she was on it, and I know that sounds selfish and possibly even old fashioned but I want her to be present with me. So, we will see.

~K~

Collaborations

This week I’ve been blessed to understand the importance of collaborating. From my meeting with another non profit founder all the way to my conversations with other women who are mom’s with tweens. It is so important in life to have a network of supportive people that you can bounce ideas off of or when you just need encouragement. 

I’ve created a Little Girls Big Dreams Group on Facebook, it is a private group that is home to any mom who needs to vent, praise, or seek advice about their tween. Mostly though it is a network for prayer because I have no idea how I’m going to last as a mom without it. God places people in your life for a reason, none of us were meant to do this alone. With this group I’d like everyone to feel free to post, and comment, and communicate in the most respectful way possible of course.  Let’s just be there for one another *cue We Are the World*. My network of friends is awesome, some married, some single, some working, some stay at home, ALL valuable to my life in some way. Open up to your peers, everyone is not out to use what you tell them against you. Don’t be afraid to lean on others, this is what sisterhood is all about. 

~K~


Photo by Eloise Ambursley on Unsplash

Back to School Tips

School starts in exactly a month for my kiddos, and I thought I’d compile a helpful list of tips to get ready and stay successful (as a mom) for the upcoming school year.

  1. Wake up earlier than your children: It truly helps to go into my daughter and sons room fully dressed requesting that they wake up versus me yelling into their bedroom from my bed. If that means setting my alarm at 6 instead of 6:30. So be it.
  2. Prepare for the entire week: I learned this from one of my best friends, would you believe that she irons ALL of her children’s clothes for the week on Sunday night? Well, she does and each and every year I’m amazed by it. No searching for shirts, or jeans, or anything like that. It helps to know exactly what you’re wearing before morning arrives.
  3. Get to know your children’s teachers/class subjects: This will allow you to ask specific questions aside from the typical “how was your day?” or “what did you do today?”. If your kids are anything like mine they’ll have one word answers. Try something like “how was art class today? What are you working on in Mrs. Beasley’s class? What project are you looking most forward to this school year?”
  4. Go to school functions: Make space in your schedule to attend school events. This not only lets the teachers and administrative staff know that you’re involved in your child’s life, but it also lets your child know that you care enough to come up to the school without being forced to due to bad behavior.
  5. Pray: Pray with your children before school, make it a normal part of their lives. Just like us, our children run into opposition, temptation, and a host of other things on a daily basis that sometimes we have no idea that they’re dealing with. Start their day and yours with a prayer.

That’s all I have currently. If anyone has any tips that they think would be helpful feel free to leave them in the comments below. We are a community that shares, so please feel free to do so.

Until next time…

~K~

Mommy Moment: Why I Stopped Getting Gel Nails.

Hey Dreamers!

Keisha here. So if any of you know me personally you know that I love a good gel mani. I might possibly live for nice shiny polish with well manicured cuticles. I make sure I don’t go longer than two weeks without getting something done to my hands. It just makes me feel really good to have a cute color on my nails. I have no idea how to polish my own nails (not my right hand) and it never comes out looking as dope as when I get them professionally done.

Well dreamers, I quit going. Not because of time, not because of money, not because I should know how to maintain my own hands at the age of 33…nope. I stopped going because my daughter received a bunch of nail polish, nail polish remover, liquid latex, and cotton swabs, for Christmas. She loves doing nails. The kid watches Youtube videos about all things nails. I was completely fine letting her paint and then re paint her own nails while leaving me to my bi weekly visits to the nail shop, until one day she wanted to do my nails and couldn’t because…well gel. So the last time I went to the nail salon I did not get gel I got polish (which was done horribly btw) and now she can do my nails as often as she likes.

This is NOT what I prefer, but I know that it’s important to support her in any way that I can. She may not be the best at polishing my nails right now, she may not even be on this by the time next Christmas comes around, but guessing a timeline is not my job as a parent. My job as a parent is to be there for her, support her, even in things I’d prefer to do a different way. Its nuts but kids remember the smallest things, the smallest gestures of love, the smallest gestures of rejection. They remember, and they carry those seeds into their adulthood and then plant them, unknowingly, in their children.

I only want to leave gestures of love with my children, my grand children, and their children. When Riley has a child I want her to recall the memories of my selflessness…not when it comes to paying bills, or taking her out for food, or buying clothes, no, all those things are what we literally HAVE to do as parents. I want her to remember my selflessness with my time. How I put down my phone and listened to a story that made zero sense, but I listened intently anyway…or how I am not sure what the stuff  made in an Easy Bake Oven is even made of…but I ate it anyway. So, yea I stopped getting my beloved gel, but I can honestly say, its worth it…and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t praying that this is just a phase lol!

Alright Dreamers! Until next time.